My grandmother was by far the most amazing person in my life. She has been gone for more than 10 years now and I still think of her almost daily. I am grateful my children knew her as, "G-Granny," for great grandma. On a regular basis she would write me letters. But not just letters. She also filled the envelope with cartoons, coupons, recipes, photos, etc. I knew when I retrieved her letter it would be a little grab bag surprise. I have kept every single one. Days before she died, I received a letter that included the following poem by Veronica Shoffs that was carefully clipped from the newspaper. This is how it reads.

 After A While

After a while, you learn the subtle difference
Between holding a hand and chaining a soul.
And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning
And company doesn’t mean security.

And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts
And presents aren’t promises.
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes open
With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.

And you learn to build all your roads on today,
Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans.
And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while, you learn
That even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.

And you learn that you really can endure...
That you really are strong and you really do have worth.
And you learn and learn...With every goodbye, you learn.

 

The poem felt like her final words of wisdom to me. Here’s what happened next. I filled her funeral with 150 balloons and made it a joyous celebration. The following week I went to Europe to work for two weeks. One of my favorite places in London is Covent Garden. Covent Garden is an outdoor flea market with sidewalk cafes and street performers.

Very, very far away from home in Covent Garden in a little shop I found the poem on parchment paper with gold embossed lettering. I just stood there hugging it and wept...but in a sweet, comforting way.

There are so many great thoughts within that poem. If you think about planting your own garden you want to put all the most beautiful colors. You would place certain fragrant flowers in the garden. You might plant the kind of flowers that attract butterflies. Your senses are exhilarated. You have grown these plants yourself. You must tend to the garden and make an effort to keep it visually pleasant by pulling weeds and protecting it against pests and fertilizing it. It is the same way with your life.

You create your own life. Put the things in it that make you happy. Add things that stimulate your senses. Get rid of the pests and give yourself room to grow.

This poem has meant the world to me over the years and I share it often in my speeches. I share it with you now and hope it resonates just how special you are. May it also encourage you to make the most of your life in crafting it to be what makes you intrinsically happy.

He has made everything beautiful in its time. Ecclesiastes 3:11